The advantages of coaching for young people

It is more powerful and enriching to listen to people than to tell them what to do!

Stephan Doukhopelnikoff Coach

Make something beautiful of what is broken. Japanese art of Kintsugi.

The essence of the Japanese art of Kintsugi or Kintsukuroi is to create something beautiful of what was once broken before!

A friend of me, Koen Vanmechelen, told me that he learned that to create, something has to be broken first… He is now influencing art and science worldwide.

This means so much more than repairing, gluing the pieces together…

Isn’t that something.
Don’t we normally walk away from what is broken. Don’t we all dislike what is broken?

How many of us see through what is broken?


Kintsukuroi. Recreating of what was broken with gold!

Imagine when you learn to master this skill to create, where the mind says that it is broken! You are transcendent! You are out of the mind!

When it got to me, I understood that you must be very open hearted and open minded to master the skill not to ‘repair’ what is broken, but to create even something better, something more beautiful.

Imagine what it is to live and master the transition from broken to beauty.
What a lesson in Life!

What do you do when you break,
or something breaks you
or something precious to you gets broken?
When something precious to me breaks, I try to stay strong.
When I was a young boy, my mother use to say: stay strong, a boy doesn’t cry.
Your recognise that? But I do cry and I always will. I accepted who I am.
My spiritual teachers taught me to see a harsh moment as a sign to pause and not to identify myself with the breaking.
When something bad happens that touches you deeply, it is the moment to pause and to take distance. My teachers taught me to do that even when something very good happens…
What do I mean by that?
When somethings happens outside of me that triggers me, I pause to recognise my emotions, perceptions or assumptions. I won’t allow them to spoil the present moment. At least I try 😉
We have to realise at any given moment (good or bad), that nothing is permanent.
Everything is evolving.
Also that we ‘perceive’ something as good or bad. Especially when we are emotionally connected or involved.
When yourself or something breaks,
you can keep on holding on to what was (illusion) or you can accept reality (what is).
You have to let go of illusions (wrong perception of a new reality), of what was, and keep on walking towards your destiny, your dreams.
Illusion can block you from seeing the beauty of a new reality.
When you learn to accept change, you can learn to master change.
You learn to see beauty where you didn’t see it before.
Only by acceptance you grow, you grow stronger to walk your path to open chances and doors that you didn’t see or where closed before.
Never forget that your path is more important than your destiny, because it is in ‘taking each step’ that you are alive, that you live Life.
It is in the present moment you decide to live Joy or to block yourself from fear, regrets, …
So keep your heart and mind open, always!


Mediator |Life coach